Intimacy

Author: Pastor Thomas G. Wilson
April 07, 2020

Revelation 2:4-5 KJV [4] Nevertheless I have somewhat against thee, because thou hast left thy first love. [5] Remember therefore from whence thou art fallen, and repent, and do the first works; or else I will come unto thee quickly, and will remove thy candlestick out of his place, except thou repent.

 

Intimacy has to do with an inner closeness and depth of relationship. It requires the deepest levels of vulnerability and self-exposure. Intimacy doesn’t happen overnight but rather is cultivated over a long period of time where certain elements are present. In order to develop or restore intimacy in a relationship the following elements represent the investment necessary:

 

Ø Sharing – an attitude of openness and surrender. Sharing of the heart through open, honest communication. There must be a priority on meaningful time together regularly for this level of sharing to take place. Lack of intimacy develops in an atmosphere of separateness and selfishness.

Ø Partnership – a relationship of mutual support and encouragement. The key to partnership is sacrifice. That happens when a spouse puts their needs/desires aside in order to honor those of their partner. Don’t compete with each other instead compliment one another. Two of the greatest oppositions to partnership are selfishness and criticism. They destroy team spirit and create separation.

Ø Investment – an atmosphere of strong regular expression of commitment. This requires consistent positive exchanges rather than always being judgmental and critical. The act of nourishing and cherishing one another bonds our spirits together. We bond with the source that meets our emotional needs and when our needs are being fulfilled by our spouse the desire to be with them increases exponentially. When you stop investing in your marriage through positive exchanges you starve the soul of the marriage.

Ø Trust – this is an environment of safety and security. It ranks first in importance when discussing intimacy. Where there is no trust intimacy is impossible. Trust is built on consistency, kindness, humility and thoughtful compassionate speech. Trust is destroyed through arrogance, harshness, betrayal, and careless words. In order for trust to be extended there is a requirement of consistently displaying a genuine heart.

 

 

For further reading: Eph.5:21-33; Gen.2:21-25

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